Well let’s get one thing straight from the start, I’m far from being a prude having had my share of massages on my travels, but my first experience of an Ayurverda treatment has opened up a whole new world for me.
Now, I did have some advance warning from my wife Anne, that personal modesty is almost non-existent in India, so I suppose I half expected what I got.
Daily Ayurveda Treatment
Having booked Devaaya on Divar Island, just off Goa, for a week’s retreat, twice daily treatments were part of the package (following assessment by the Ayurverdic Doctor and a treatment package established!).
Sat in the delightful waiting area on my first day, donning a giant colourful gown, I must confess I was wondering what was in order for me.
My therapist, Justin (not sure that was his real name!), a very polite and prim young man, came and escorted me to my treatment room, ethnic with a giant dark wood treatment table in the centre.
The order of things upon entering the room is to take off the giant gown and any underwear, then stand there in all your modesty while he ties some paper pants around your “bits”.
Paper pants in place, I sit on a stool, have my feet washed and then have ample amounts of treacle like oil massaged into my hair for a 15 minute head massage. Very nice indeed!
Next face down onto the massage table, having the aforementioned paper pants whipped off, for an oily, full body (and I mean full body!) massage. There was definitely the odd finger slipping in the nether crack region from time to time.
Second Daily Ayurveda Treatment
I think this was the warm up massage, as my later afternoon one was shorter but certainly more “interesting”.
A light lunch later, and it is time for massage number two. This time we are in one of the seven outside huts, each being a fully operational unit (showers, oil burning stoves etc). No paper pants offered this time (we’re old friends by now surely?!), it’s face up on to the table, with a hefty draft from the fan above for good measure! (I’m sure that cold breeze didn’t help, if you know what I mean).
What pursued is entirely my own fault. I made the error of informing the young, female Ayurverdic Doctor, that I had suffered a groin injury playing football around three weeks earlier. All the bruising had gone and it was well on the mend, but clearly she thought this was an area to focus on.
Light-fingered Justin was under orders to give me the hot oil treatment and cure that problematic groin. Laying there in all my glory, he proceeded to cook hot oil on the stove, then drip it on to my groin area and massage it in, gently easing anything that might be in the way, to one side.
Now hot oil can be an issue at the best of times, but mix in a fella’s delicate areas and this may cause permanent damage!
Now, to be honest the oil and subsequent massage, felt great. It’s just that the oil getting a little hotter with each session was worrying. Burning of the groin, not great, but burning of the left gonad, well that’s just not right!
Having warm oil smeared all over a chap’s wedding tackle may sound great to some of you guys but you probably have visions of Jennifer Aniston doing the applying, not Justin from Goa and certainly not with oil hot enough to cause permanent scarring.
Again, this may just be me and my sick mind, but it feels great getting massaged and oiled up in this area, I find myself thinking “I hope for gods sake I don’t start liking this too much”, if you know what I mean…
Fortunately, this doesn’t occur, and I’m sure for Justin, he’s just going through the daily motions, and brushing up against my privates is just “another day in the office” for him. Well I hope so, especially as after the oily massages, I’m stood naked with him down on his knees smearing a peanut butter like gunk all over me, before I shower.
As each day and session goes by, I find it less inhibiting and more liberating to completely doff off and allow another guy to rub me up for an hour or so, which is good because half way through the week Justin brings in a new guy for a four hands massage. So now I have two of them going at me in tandem!!
Yes, it’s certainly different to massages I have been used to but the experience was great, and I would highly recommend it to anyone as long as you approach it with an open mind and go with the flow.
What’s the worst that could happen……. Oh yes, but fortunately it didn’t!!!
If you wish to find out more about Devaaya, please see my wife’s review. If you then feel sufficiently inspired to go ahead and book, please quote ANNESBROOKS when booking to secure a TravelTheGlobe4Less 10% discount.
Maybe you have had a similar experience, and would like to share it below. It would be great to know I am not alone!